Back in 2013 I wrote about my old comrade David Rickerby’s crowdsourcing campaign. Unfortunately, raising funds was the easy part and publishing his first novel seems to have been beset on most sides by shitweasels who overstated their worth then ran for the hills after making a pig’s ear of things. For crippling the copy, delaying the release and tormenting an old man, these blundering halfwits deserve an obscene amount of libellous character assassination.

Now’s not the time though. I mean when you’re a natural at something it doesn’t look like improvisation which is why I’ve never been much for premeditation when setting out to offend a whole bunch of people. That being said, there’s no harm in checking first how many of them will be falling over themselves to get me in a firm headlock and stab me in the eyes with their keys.

Anyway, this was supposed to be a celebration. The revised Bloody Fields is done and damn well dusted. Hip hip . . . !